Does this man live in Independence?

Does this man live in Independence?

Lets go down the checklist:
• Shirt off? Check.
• White, dad New Balance shoes? Check.
• Smoking a cigar? Check.
• Beautiful long hair? Check.
• Chest tat? Check.
• Gold chain? Check.
• Hanging out outside a ghetto daycare? Check.

Yes, this man lives in Independence.

Hot Rods and Flatbeds.

Last week, I went to Steak and Shake to get some lunch. As I was sitting in my booth, I heard the faintest, most grizzly voice I've ever heard. It sounded as if its owner ate lit cigarettes all day while smoking cigarettes and then ate those cigarettes too. It was as if a bulldozer was outside dragging a car that was chained to a Harley that was getting hailed on by gravel.

I looked over, and the image did not disappoint.

 This guy was in "Burt Reynolds mode." A true flashback of Americana, he played the part incredibly. Slicked back hair, Rhett Butler 'stache, blurred-out name tat on his hand, and drinking a sweet tea.

I couldn't make out all of the words that he was saying, but I didn't need to know them all. I heard the best ones. Here's a list of the words I caught:

• Tars (tires), which he said like 4 times.
• '55. I'm assuming he was talking about a car.
• Whiskey. 'Nuff said.
• Kentucky. Yep.
• Shrimp. Hmm... interesting...
• Football field.
• Flatbed. This one's probably my favorite.

I loved seeing this guy. He's a dying breed.

The Walking Man Walks

Every day I see this man. Walking. Up and down the sidewalk. I've seen him walking at almost every point on my route to work at any given time of the day.

At first, I wondered... "Is this a man, or a woman?" The hair suggests a woman, but a rugged flannel shirt says "This is a manly-man shirt." 

And then, there's the shorts... Volleyball teams wouldn't be seen in such short shorts.

I guess if I had leg muscles like these, I'd probably wear less than shorts too. Nice shave job.

I've adopted the name "Chris" for him when talking in the workplace with co-workers who also pass by this man day by day. I call him Chris, because he's always Walken. (Christopher Walken). Yeah, it's lame, but I don't really know his name. 

Every day, same wardrobe. Short-shorts, hair pulled back high, trainers, a tank top and flannel over it. Oh, and water and sometimes a yoga mat or something. Then one day, he wore a KC Chiefs shirt. 

Yesterday, I went to the grocery store, and Chris was there. Like a child seeing Michael Jackson's moonwalk for the first time, I was in awe as I ran up to him. "Hey man... (hey) I always see you walking... (yeah) Um, where are you going?" With a very controlled stare, he said "I walk to the gym. Miles and miles. If you see me walking, I'm either walking to or from the gym. One to two times a day. (Woah...)" "So, like, what do you do there at the gym, like yoga or swim?" 

He took a deep breath and exhaled very slowly. With metered blinks he calmly said "I'm trying to get back into bodybuilding. It's what I do."

Woah. In my head all of the weirdest questions were circling. Like why does he walk? Why a flannel shirt on a 95 degree day? Do you have a job? But all I could think to say was "Cool. Keep it up, man."

He nodded politely and walked away. 

I really do think I've seen him somewhere before. Oh yeah! Here:

Walking man in the 80s?

Hot to Trot

Does this man live in Independence?

Let's go down the checklist:

• Ponytail? check.
• Shirt off? check.
• Camo shorts? check.
• Gold chain? check.
• Shirt tucked in waistband? check.
• Upper-back tattoo? check.
• More than 2 rings on one hand? check.
• Flip flops? (not pictured, but believe me on this one) check.

Yes, this man lives in Independence.

Abandoned House in the Woods

A few years ago, I was walking through the woods, searching for morel mushrooms. These are the kind of mushrooms that kinda look like a small, brown tree made out of a sponge. I walked and walked until I came to an abandoned house.

The house itself was in a drastic state of disrepair, but I cautiously entered through the back porch. As I looked around, I realized that the house had not been touched in over 40 years, assuming to the 1968 calendar in one of the bedrooms was current at the time of abandonment. There was really nothing of value in the house, but the artifacts were incredible.

There were boxes of clothes-mending materials, magazines, books, and newspapers laid on the dining room table, and the air smelled of musty carpet as a broken window brought in the elements. Clothes were still in closets and dishes were still in the sink.

As I looked around in the kitchen, my eyes fell to a chalkboard near the back door.

I didn't want to enter the kitchen, as it was a mess, and I was afraid the floor might give way, so I squinted and leaned through the doorway to read what it said. Sounding out the words, I came up with "Wait Right (here) Be Back." 

Chills ran down my arms, and I felt as though the secret eyes of the house just opened to see its intruder. Slowly, I walked backwards, but quickly made my way out the back. I'll never forget the way I felt when I read those words. The warm, inviting empty house full of artifacts became cold and I needed to get out of there before I was closed up in a time envelope.

Hiking Viking

Does this man live in Independence?

Let's go down the checklist:

• Talking on the phone? Check.

• Shirt off? Check.

• Gold chain? Check.

• Visible underwear? Check.

• LOWER-BACK TATTOO? Check.

• Walking ridiculous dog in 98 degree heat? Check.

• Jersey for a shirt? Check.

• Flip-flops? Check.

• Armband tattoo? Check.

• Hanging around an Elementary School? Check.

Yes, this man lives in Independence.

Is There Room in Your Soul?

I found these pics on my phone. I took them last fall through the cracked windshield of my old car, but never posted them. Just a random sight in Independence.